Do you ever have conversations with God, using Scripture as his words? Recently this just sort of happened to me, as I was processing a dear friend’s death. What started as a personal journal entry for me became a healing conversation with God. I share it in hopes that processing some of your own hurts, too, could become part of a conversation with our living, loving, listening God who I know has healing words for you….
Less than eighteen hours ago, I learned one of the dearest, most wonderful friends of my life had died the night before. I didn’t get to have final words with her. (I hope she read the last text I sent just a couple days ago, but I don’t know.) I didn’t get to have a last hug. (Or actually I did; I just didn’t realize at the time it would be our last.) I am so sad. My heart feels truly broken. I miss her so much and will for the rest of my life. My world will never be the same.
“Very truly I tell you, you will weep and mourn while the world rejoices.”
Probably more times than necessary I’d told my family I wanted her to speak at my funeral. I think that’s because I always felt she really knew me. And that’s a special thing in this world: to be truly known and still be loved by another. She appreciated me—she genuinely cared about the unique sorrows and joys of my heart. I felt and knew her love through our same love languages. And even if we hadn’t seen each other or talked for a long time, she felt like my kindred spirit because we thought the same way: our hearts and minds “saw” symbolic meanings that we believed God gave. Together we saw and embraced our heavenly Father’s gracious, lavish love.
“You will grieve, but your grief will turn to joy.”
I think what I’m describing is a true friend. And that’s a very special gift in this world because, at least in my life, it’s very rare.
“Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy.”
As I cried myself to sleep last night, I realized this is a new kind of grief for me. I’ve grieved the losses of my infant son, four beloved dogs, all my grandparents, and other dear human beings and precious animals, but this is the first time I’ve experienced the death of a deeply cherished friend.
“I have told you these things so that in me you may have peace.”
But in my tears I’ve also realized something else: in this new grief, I also have a new joy. Because the love that my friend and I have always shared has been interwoven with our faith in Jesus—our friendship truly a gift wrapped in God’s love for us—I know we’ll be together again someday WITH JESUS.
And that is such unspeakably glorious news.
I don’t know what God has prepared for us—what our laughing and tiramisu cake and heartfelt conversation will look like—but because Jesus has conquered death and forever lives, we will, too, in paradise. He has said he’ll make all things new, so he will. Yes, this current separation stings, but I will see my dear friend again. And I will, for an eternity of other reasons also, rejoice.
“In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
As I grieve this very painful loss of my precious, beautiful friend, I am so thankful Jesus said, “…your grief will turn to joy.” I imagine in the moment he was referring to how others would feel surrounding his crucifixion and resurrection, but I also believe he and his words—for Jesus is the Word—are eternal and timeless and can touch our lives and heartbreaks in any moment.
My grief will turn to joy.
I am so thankful for the promise…for the hope it brings. Thankful for the encouragement to “take heart” in this world, which means “have courage.” Thankful that my grief hurts so much because the love my friend and I share is so great. Thankful for my Father God, the Giver of every good and perfect gift, like my friend. And so, so grateful that as I grieve, I can rest my weary head on the perfect “gentle and humble in heart” pillow of Jesus and have peace.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
Friend—whoever you are reading this—Jesus’ words are entirely for you, too.
(Scriptures quoted and referred to include: John 1:1; 16:20, 22, 33; Hebrews 11:1, 13-16; 1 Corinthians 2:9; 13:12; Luke 23:43; Revelation 21:5; James 1:17; and Matthew 11:28.)
